Musings

My Way Back Home

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painting of a countryside scene

Every day I sit in the verandah drinking tea and soaking in the quiet and I feel more and more at home. I think about what this year has been like for me, how a lot of it has been about me come home to myself, finding home in the most unexpected places, learning that home can be more than one place at a time.

Musings

Growth, and with It, Happiness

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In an ideal world, right now I would be out day-drinking with my friends. I would have had a lovely breakfast of French toast, good coffee, sausages and a fruit salad. I would have received so many Mpesa messages that I would be unable to receive any more money. I would be wearing a new […]

Musings

The Shattering

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After years and years, you will finally learn the sound a heart makes when it breaks. You will realise that it is a slow process, one crack after another; so quiet that you will only hear them getting a bit bigger when it’s dark out and the only competing sound is that of your breathing. […]

Musings

Little Black Dress

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There is a dress that sits somewhere in my wardrobe, folded with everything else as though it holds no special meaning to me. My mother bought that dress two years ago—the money was hers, I mean. It was one of those glorious days when she expresses love by saying, “I saw some nice clothes at […]

Musings

A Year of Lessons

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The year has gone by fast. By ‘the year’, I mean last year because this post was supposed to go up before 2018 closed its eyes. One minute the blog is down because the nice people at the domain company decided to ignore my payment, and the next, it’s January and I have gone about […]

Musings

Becoming

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becoming

You will take ages to decide and when you finally do, you will never stop wondering whether you chose well.

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The Rest of Our Lives

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multipotentialite

Some people’s lives go in a straight line. There is a path and they stick to it. They know what they will become when they grow up and every effort they make throughout their lives is somehow related to that. They are focused on their goal, confident in their abilities, driven. They know exactly where […]

Musings

First Impressions

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first impressions

When I decided to go back to school after I had just finished school, even I wasn’t sure what I was doing. But I was okay with being in school; the school environment is comfortable for me. What I am not comfortable with is meeting new people. Starting from scratch. Smiling at strangers. Squirming in […]

Musings

The Sneer on Tomorrow’s Face

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At long last, you are done. You did it. You went to school and you managed not to drop out no matter how much you wanted to during those days when you had to stay up all night cramming for an exam that you had vowed to prepare properly for at the beginning of the […]

Musings

Free, Fearless

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fearless

I had been waiting for that matatu to fill up for about fifteen minutes.  I was getting antsy. But there was nowhere else to go; the mats to Westlands from Odeon were too far away for my aching feet and the crowded road there too daunting for my anxiety. Context: a month and a half […]