Musings

Still Pretty Great

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A photo of heart-shaped balloons in the air.

Alternative Title: I Kissed Dating Goodbye. (Shaurraut to all my babes raised in purity culture. We will overcome!) I write this as I prepare to bury myself in a binge-read of an eight-book romance series. I have not even begun but it’s taking me a lot of effort not to squeal every time I think […]

Musings

Dark and Full of Terrors

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Image of a house on a moonlit night

For kawaida Kenyans who are just trying to make a life, Nairobi is bad vibes, we know this.  But after spending the better part of 2020 at the coast, I had missed some of the comforts of home: fast food that gets to the house half an hour after I’ve ordered it, constant WiFi (when […]

Musings

The Distance Between Us

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a corked bottle with a scroll inside it, lying on the ground near a body of water

Alternative Title 1: Why Does Friendship Get Harder as You Get Older? Alternative Title 2: For Julie Friendship is a funny thing. One moment you’re going about the business of existing in a capitalist world that takes everything from you (your time, your energy, your relationships, your dignity, your will to live, et cetera) and […]

Musings

My Way Back Home

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painting of a countryside scene

Every day I sit in the verandah drinking tea and soaking in the quiet and I feel more and more at home. I think about what this year has been like for me, how a lot of it has been about me come home to myself, finding home in the most unexpected places, learning that home can be more than one place at a time.

Musings

Growth, and with It, Happiness

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In an ideal world, right now I would be out day-drinking with my friends. I would have had a lovely breakfast of French toast, good coffee, sausages and a fruit salad. I would have received so many Mpesa messages that I would be unable to receive any more money. I would be wearing a new […]

Musings

Like Watching Beyoncé

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There are few things more inspiring to me than a Beyoncé performance. And these are just the performances I have seen on YouTube. I can’t begin to imagine what it feels like to see her live. When I watch those videos and see people pulling out their hair and foaming at the mouth and screaming […]

Musings

The Shattering

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After years and years, you will finally learn the sound a heart makes when it breaks. You will realise that it is a slow process, one crack after another; so quiet that you will only hear them getting a bit bigger when it’s dark out and the only competing sound is that of your breathing. […]

Musings

The Imposter

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The Imposter will come upon you quickly and suddenly. She will come often but that won’t stop you from being startled each time she pounces, from feeling winded each time she fades into the background of your life, leaving you to begin building a false sense of security before she pounces again and shatters everything […]

Musings

Little Black Dress

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There is a dress that sits somewhere in my wardrobe, folded with everything else as though it holds no special meaning to me. My mother bought that dress two years ago—the money was hers, I mean. It was one of those glorious days when she expresses love by saying, “I saw some nice clothes at […]

Musings

Just Jam

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I used to sing. People who have only known me in the last two years don’t know this about me and I am happy to keep it that way. I was decent at it so when I walked away from it two years ago, everybody and their grandmother had questions. ‘So have you quit music […]